Coping with trauma
Accept this is normal
First (and most important): these feelings are normal - very unpleasant but normal. This is what happens to normal people when something abnormal happens to them. These feelings will die down once your system settles. You can speed this up by doing these things:
Keep your life as normal as you can
Try to do all the usual things you do even if you do not feel like doing this:
- Stay at work if you are up to it
- Keep up your social life
- Go to the shops
- Visit your family and friends
- Take the children here and there
The more you can keep the usual routine going, the sooner you will come out the other end.
Face your fears
This is hard to do. But the more you face your fears, the more you control your stress. The message is:
The more you avoid, the more problems you build up in the future
The more you face up, the more you improve
So if you were in a crash, get back driving as soon as you can. If you were attacked, try to go back to the area where it happened (if it is safe to do so)
Try to allow the thoughts about the event to stay in your mind. If you can, and even though this is hard to do, try to go over the event in great detail again and again and again. This will make you stressed in the short term. In the long term, the stress will die down and you will feel more in control.
Be more active
Make sure you get out and about as much as you can.
Exercise can help you feel less stressed.
Give yourself one goal a day. Something that will stretch you but not too far. So don't bite off more than you can chew. And pat yourself on the back when you reach the goal.
Watch what you drink
It is common for people to drink more after a trauma. Do not do this. It will make you a lot worse.
So do keep going to the pub if this is a normal part of your life. But don't drink more than usual.
Don't drink alone at home.
Learn to relax
Visit the anxiety self-help section of the site for help on breathing and relaxation skills. The downloads section of the site has useful audio to help you too.
Controlling nightmares
If you have a nightmare:
- Keep a pen and paper at your bedside
- Write down all you can recall in as much detail as you can
- Read through what you have written as often as you can. This will make you tense at first. The more you do it, the less tense you will be. The less tense you are, the less likely you are to have more nightmares.
