Quick tips on dealing with depression
1. Deal with problems on the spot
Don't bottle up your feelings. They will just grow until they erupt. So if there are problems at, e.g. work, make sure that you deal with them on the spot.
2. Strong, confiding relationships
Stress often makes us hard to live with. This can cause problems with those close to us. But we know that strong relationships can help fight stress. So if there is a problem here, get to work on it.
3. Musts and Shoulds
"I must see my mum today"; "I should offer to run the football team this year". Work out what you can cope with and be happy with this - "If I get through all the things I want to at home, I'll take a run down to my mums. If not, I'll see her through the week"; "I don't get a chance to relax as it is so it's daft to take on more pressure - someone else can take a turn"
4. Coping with ruts
If you feel your life is in a rut just now - same old routine day in and day out - then think about change. Plan your week-ends - do something different - go for a drive, visit friends, go for a long walk. Take up new hobbies. Look for challenges. If you can afford it, plan the odd week-end away. A change of scenery can help.
5. Divide problems up
If you face a huge problem and can see no way to cope with it, see if you can divide it up into 'bite sized- bits'. Then tackle the bits one at a time.
6. Past experience
If you are in a jam, ask yourself if you have been in a similar jam before. How did you deal with it? If what you did worked, try it again. If it didn't, learn from your mistakes.
7. Eating
There may be a link between what you eat and how you feel. But it is hard to say just what the link is. There is still a lot to learn here. But here are some suggestions:
- Try 'the Fighting Five' - vitamins A, C and E, zinc and selenium - to help stress. You get these in things like plums, kiwi fruit, dark green veg, seafood and sesame seeds.
- You may help low mood if you eat bananas, turkey, cottage cheese and dried dates. You can also try peanuts (not salted), fish and cheese.
- A high-carb breakfast may get you off to a good start in the day. Think about muesli.
- If you feel down, think about Omega-3. This is found in oily fish such as mackerel.
- Vitamin supplements can be pricey and, unless your diet is very poor, will not help much. Taking too many vitamins can be as bad as taking too little.
- Over the long term, try to eat more healthy foods - get away from fried and fatty food. Cut down on salt. Eat more fruit, veg and whole-wheat bread. Don't eat too much.
8. Situations beyond your control
There are things in life that you can't change - people get ill, people die, people lose jobs. Bad things happen so learn to accept them. Stop hitting your head off a brick wall unless you think the wall can come down.
9. Build relaxation into your life
Put aside some time each day just for you. Go out for a walk, phone a friend, do the garden, read a book, watch TV, listen to music.
10. Prioritise
If you do have a busy life, you must decide what has to be done and what can wait. Put these in some order. Number 1 has to be done first thing, number 2 by 12 o'clock - number 10 can wait till the end of the week. Keep revising your list.
11. Do the worst thing first
If you have a list of things to do, do the one you least want to do first. Once you get it out of the way, the rest of the tasks will seem easier to cope with. If you keep putting it off, it will prey on your mind and may seem a lot worse than it really is. Tie this in with your priority list above.
12. Don't try to be Superman or Wonder Woman
Do you try to do it all? Cope all the time? Be the best? Why? The house and your job will still be there long after you are gone. Stick to your good points and learn to live with your faults. Don't try to be perfect. None of us is.
13. Confide in others
Seek out those you can trust and let them know how you feel. They may be able to see ways out of problems that you have not thought about. In any case, it will help to get things off your chest. It may also help you feel less isolated.
14. Other people's shoes
If you have a problem, think how you would react if a friend came to you with that same problem. What advice would you give them? Would that advice work for you?
15. Keep a structure to each day
You might find that depression invades most areas in your life. Try to put up barricades to stop it. It will help a lot if you keep a routine in your life even if you don't feel like it:
- If you go to the football at the weekend, keep going
- If you visit your mother's house during the week, keep going
- If you go to the bingo twice a week, keep going
- As work is a big part of our week, try to keep going to it if you can.
If you are not at work, make sure you have a structure to each day. Try to get up early. Get washed and dressed straight away. Eat a breakfast. Try to get out the house (go for the paper). Eat at the usual times. Try to see people. Make a schedule for each day. Try to plan for the next day the night before. Go to bed at a reasonable hour.
